Friday, October 16, 2009

I Don't Know What to Say

This morning I awake to the realization that our son who has struggled with drug abuse in the past is still battling this awful addiction. Last night I overheard a conversation he was having with a friend and caught him. Call it a mom's intuition. I just knew something wasn't right. I got angry right away and told him that his father has known all along. I guess I was just so hopeful that this journey was over.
The biggest problem is that he and all of the other teens around him do no think it's wrong. It's only pot they say. What's the big deal??? Well we say IT"S ILLEGAL, IT MESSES WITH YOUR JUDGEMENT, IT LEADS TO OTHER THINGS, YOU'RE ONLY 16!!!
He is smart. Really smart. He is 16 and a dually enrolled student in college and high school at the same time. He has everything going for him. Except this.
I cried and cried last night. We have 2 other kids and they were right in the middle of the mess and they cried too. Our 12 year old son just doesn't get it! He thinks it's such a waste of time and money!
Our 3 year just wanted her older bother to hold her and when he pushed her away she was soooo sad. It makes me cry now just thinking about it.
So we do not know where to go from here. Pray pray pray.

2 comments:

♥Amber Filkins♥ said...

Ohhhh, so sorry Jenn. I don't know what to say either. How do you get your child through such a thing?? And get him through safely and not move on to harder things?? I cannot even begin to imagine how torn up your family must feel right now.

I'm so sorry.

I'll be saying lots of prayers. God will bring you all through. It's just hard when you want to protect your kids, and can't fully.

Train up a child in the way that he should go. And when he is older, he will not stray.

That probably wasn't word for word, but you get the jist. :)

Jenn said...

Thank you Amber! Especially with all your going through too. We are just so frustrated. Love, Jenn